Making that first contact with a counsellor.
Coming to therapy for the first time can be a daunting prospect. Sometimes, people are at a crossroads. They may feel ‘stuck’ – not knowing how to progress their lives after a setback. They may be experiencing life events that they cannot make sense of. They may feel overwhelmed by confusion and panic, unable to decide what to do next. They may withdraw inwards to themselves and become lost in negative overthinking. Whatever the reason, people are unique and their reasons for coming to counselling and psychotherapy are as individual as they are.
Many are referred to counselling by their GP. It is also common for people to decide to go straight to the counsellor themselves. Sometimes a conversation with a loved one or friend can be the starting point. A phone call, text or email to a counsellor can follow after this. It does not make it any easier to ask for help with psychological or emotional distress. I know from attending my own therapy that feelings of awkwardness and vulnerability were quite strong at the time. Dealing with hesitation may persist until the day of the first appointment. It is important that the individual is ready to talk about their situation so that they can create a safe connection that can be the foundation for the counselling relationship.
Counselling can build a relationship where we feel supported so that we can heal, develop a self awareness to find the answers we are searching for. Of course, it can offer many other things but ultimately, we may feel we are repositioned to take on life’s challenges again.
It is also important that the person coming to therapy is realistic – expecting others or the past to change only results in frustration and sometimes a deepened experience of despair. I do not mention this to discourage the individual but rather to help them focus on what counselling offers – an opportunity to be curious about themselves. Why they are the way they are and how they can become the active agents in changing their own lives.
Finding a counsellor can be a difficult task if you don’t know where to start. Here are a number of things to guide you:
Check that the counsellor has the proper qualifications
Make sure that the counsellor feels like a good fit for your needs, where you find yourself in life and most importantly a good fit for you
Search counselling and psychotherapy accreditation bodies.
Consult with your GP
When making that initial contact it can be difficult to know what to say and how to word it. The therapist should understand this. The difficulties and stress of reaching out to a mental health professional is a known issue for counsellors. You should feel reassured that the issue you are struggling with can be dealt with and you should also feel reassurance around their professional approach - appointment times, cost etc.
In conclusion, i would like to say that should you need a counsellor please do not hesitate to contact me through the contact form on the site, by phone or email. I am based in Caragh, Naas, Co Kildare which is a short drive from Naas (7 min.s) and Newbridge (11 min.s). I also offer online therapy.
William Dunlea,
Caragh,
Naas,
Co. Kildare.
